JUST A WORD

Sometimes I just love having the memory around because I'm aware of the value of it in my past. But, it doesn't show or define me a someone that love to keep trying on something that make me hurt more people. I am not the fan of it.  Some memory is a reason why I am still breathing and catching up with my life. Some memory make me stand firm. But, I really hate becoming the same me in the past. The only thing that I keep ask from Him is please avoid me to cross path with anyone from my goodbye. I tried my best to live my life and I am doing fine with it. So, I do hope you are living your life. Stop looking for something that doesn't wish to be found. Stop looking for something that hidden. There is a reason why it stay low and untraceable.  I still love looking at the sky but this time I just love looking at it because it has witness the entire life of mine. I love the sky because it's no longer hold a memory that regret in my life. 

Lately, I always feel tired where I couldn't feel any energy inside me. I don't know how I can still work, walk or "alive" when I am totally exhausted. I don't even have a power to talk anymore. I wonder where did those beautiful day of mine had gone. I wonder where that tough girl had missing. I wonder where the feeling faded away.  I want to take a rest but this life won't let me. I want to stop but this life definitely control my path. What should I do then? I want to disappear but this life always find me. I want to scream it loud but there totally no sound that can come out. Too tired to think that there is tomorrow. Too tired to meet people which if I could choose to lock myself inside my room, yes I will choose that because it give me a comfort and make me feel safe.  And now, things is not always what it is. Sometimes I just push myself through the day and when the night come, I will stay on my bed waiting to continue the next day.  But, I believe that